The real world

The competition everywhere is insane and school hasn't been smooth, draining more than ever with all the politics here and there. These few days seems like a roller coaster ride to me, I experienced all kind of emotions in like just 2 to 3 days and it's definitely enough to make me think, really think hard about life, people.

FYP really has the ability to cause friends to fall out with one another because of selfishness and this time, it really puts me on the verge of completely losing it. So much things happened.. really so much.

I'm sorry if I'm being selfish because I really feel that the choice that Me and Cherie made really impacted a lot of things. But this is not coming out from bad intentions, if we knew this beforehand or this opportunity came earlier, we would have never done that. And because it was what we wanted to do and really feel like doing.  I just knew that it was what I felt like doing so it was what I was going to do. And its definitely ok if people want to hate us cause I believe, at the end of the day everyone is selfish and will only go for things that benefit them the most. Who wouldn't want the best for themselves?

To be honest, I'm tired or can I say, both of us are tired of always giving in and putting people before us and in the end, we gain nothing. I always give so much to people and even go beyond my limits to help people but that day was the day I really felt disappointed because the true colors of certain people just got revealed to me. Its just disappointment all over again. I really felt very disappointed by your actions because I never expected you to say that. For now, I learnt that I really do not want to go beyond my limits to help people again. I'm just gonna try to learn to be selfish because at the end of the day, who cares about your efforts? Who cares about you? But because you're someone who I really like as a friend, I'm just gonna shake it off but I guess there are times when I can never look at things/you in the same way again.

I really don't know how else should I put everything into words, like really. There are really too much things that are happening and there are so much mixed emotions that I felt..

Owell, I hope the choices that I made would not go wrong because it really affects me a lot and the people around me. I learnt so much this time, I experienced so much in just a few days and I am really very overwhelmed by the impact of my choice that I feel that.. I'm really afraid to choose anything at all now because I am really scare that I will make the choice that will change everything again.

Year 2 was insane, crazily insane, so much experiences gained. Year 3 gonna be a test of perseverance and breakthrough. All the best to me and Cherie. All we can do now is control how we react to whatever life throws at me and just focus on the future and hope that we're not wrong in our decision, if its wrong I'm just gonna tell myself I did it for a good reason.

I can't please everyone and there's bound to be sacrifices made so let's just be brave and face it.

I'm tired of all these. Everything that I thought were easy just got harder and harder each day.

Till then, JIAYOU with the never ending stress and never ending assignments to take on.